| Of all the place she could have steered us to, life has brought us here. A cliched sunset against a pure, cool evening wind. An ancient oak tree rustling softly behind our backs. A few quiet ticks from my watch and the Hollywood sunset gives way to the Hollywood moon, full and welcoming. The storybook stars illuminate us but the night still swallow us whole, leaving me with you. The things I could tell you if I had strength or wisdom enough to lift these clamps off of me. I have too much room in my heart while you've got yours filled with too much of things I'll never know. Sounds from the city drift up the gentle slope of this hill; people going this way and that, for reasons known only to them. And this is the sound of me attempting to free myself of all my bitterness without reason, all sighs and inhaling and awkward shuffling of my feet. Take me in your arms and let me forget my name for an hour tonight. Take me in your heart and let me forget the sins on my hands. Take me and the flaws I carry upon my shoulders and the memories that I have draped over my eyes and the pain thatI have pierced into my sides and let me forget that I never believed in cliched magic.
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| Wilco is going to release a new album, Sky Blue Sky, May 15th. A couple of the tracks have been leaked and I think (not that I matters what I think) that the best of those is "Impossible Germany". Here's the link: http://www.bornbytheriver.com/music/Wilco-Impossible_Germany.mp3
I especially like when the song dissolves into a guitar duel (guitar duels are always welcome).
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| During the break, Jason, Matt, Dennis and I were engaged in a discussion on how best to survive a zombie invasion. Jason had some insane and moronic idea about locking himself and some highly specialized people in a Costco, growing and living off of crops and packaged foods.
His idea, obviously, is inherently flawed. First of all, the last thing you want to do in case of a zombie invasion is lock yourself into a small area. Sure, it may stave off the undead for a few days - weeks, even - but, in the long run, they will overrun your thin walls. Zombies are intelligent, but they somehow stumble upon ways to force themselves into places where they aren't welcome. Jason's idea also hinges on the ability to grow crops, which is incredibly stupid. Within the dank concrete walls of a warehouse such as Costco, crops would not get any of the ample sunlight they need to grow, nor would they have access to the water they require. Even if Jason somehow restructured and reconstructed the building to accommodate the crops' needs (and somehow did so in a manner that did not compromise the already suspect defensive qualities of the Costco), the seeds would not grow fast enough. The power would have likely been cut off as a result of the zombie scourge and the food held within the warehouse prior to Jason's occupation would spoil quickly. The canned foods can only carry so his delusional team so far. There also exists the very real possibility of his team growing paranoid and fearful. Under the stress and lack of lighting, each member will fall further and further into paranoia, eventually turning on each other and weakening their ability to fight off a zombie horde.
Here is how to properly survive an uprising by our undead foe:
a) Pack guns. Multiple guns, with a good store of ammunition. This is not a videogame. You will not likely find crates within bullets stowed away inside scattered throughout the ruined countryside of the new world.
b) Keep a good knife within reach. Don't overthink it and end up bringing a machete or katana or whatever. You will need something portable and easily maneuverable.
c) Compile a team of skilled and fit people, preferably with prior training with firearms and nerves of titanium. I don't care if you want to stay with your best friend during the darkest of hours. Your best friend is a fatass, he will die anyway.
d) Don't trust anybody. Because you aren't bringing along your best friends (most likely), you will be best off not trusting anyone. Not the seemingly friendly storekeeper. Not the policeman would insists on giving you a ride. Not the hot girl with Navy Seal training that happened to join your merry band of zombie killers. Trust no one.
e) Keep walking. Never settle into a shack in a remote countryside. The zombies, they know. They will find you.
f) Stick to the coast. Should your desperate trek last for a year or more, you will want to be in a place where the temperature doesn't fluctuate too much. You will also want to have a dependable escape route at all times. The coast offers both of these. Zombies can't swim, always remember that.
Jason is an idiot who won't survive for one week under real zombie conditions. Never listen to that false prophet; he can only bring you pain and, ultimately and gruesomely, death.
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| "Best Pop Performance by Vocal Duo/Group: 'My Humps' by the Black Eyed Peas"
At least James Blunt didn't win anything.
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